


The Crush Song

by SecretScribbles



Series: Finding [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bruises, Gen, Lessons learned, M/M, Other, Some Swearing, accusations of homophobia but not really, asking out gone ary, crush fails, however you wanna call it, it's their first time trying to go on a date you guys, just like I promised, necessary fighting, punches, unnecessary fighting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:15:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27403378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SecretScribbles/pseuds/SecretScribbles
Summary: He was angry. So, very angry. He couldn’t believe Lance would hurt him like this, and yet, the proof was there underneath his pounding skin.The fear, the anger, the hurt.The betrayal.Keith couldn’t stand it. So he had to go. He didn't know where he was going but he stormed over there regardless, his anger clouding his vision more than it should have for one, little slip up, one stupid question. But there was more to it, and Keith refused to acknowledge it. Because if he did, then he would have had to admit things that he wasn't ready for. Things that he knew couldn't happen. That despite all that, he had wanted to say yes.So. Very. Badly.
Relationships: keith lance, lance lotor, pidge beazer
Series: Finding [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949962
Comments: 16
Kudos: 21





	The Crush Song

**Author's Note:**

> I LIVE, HAPPY HALLOWEEN AND EVERYTHING ELSE
> 
> Just a reminder that this is NOT chapter 41, but an extra bonus chapter in the Finding the Way series I like to call Extra Courage. There is a TRIGGER WARNING for some punches thrown and a bit of fuckboi at work, but other than that, it should be ok. Nothing too violent or descriptive, tbh  
> Chapter 41 is so much more special and I can't wait for you guys to read it, BUT there are things I have to do in the real world first because responsibility is a nagging, nagging witch sometimes T-T
> 
> This bonus chapter is sort of a prequel, I guess. The boys are all 17-18 and Pidge is about 16-17 and they're all freshman in college at this time somewhere near the end of their first year together. Getting close to summer time.

**Bonus chapter: Finding The Way**

**To Extra Courage**

**-**

[ **The Crush Song** ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHDuYT1WdmQ%C2%A0)

**twaimz**

-

Today was the day, he was going to do it… Right after lunch. 

-

What a terrible day for a bad hair day. Bad stomach, too; what are the odds.

-

This was the fifth song he had written for him and it was just as beautiful as the last. He _had_ to see it now, had to _notice,_ had to _know,_ had to _-_

Oh God, no one could ever figure it out, that would be mortifying if he were ever caught mooning so badly, just _no._

-

Today. It _had_ to be today. He was sure of it.

-

If only his professor would shut _up_ maybe he could- oh. Oh they stopped talking. Well then… 

What a lovely day it was.

-

Okay, so maybe it wasn't right until then, but now, now Lance was certain that it was the right time. 

It had to be.

-

"I'm gonna do it," Lance said, determined. "I'm gonna ask Keith out."

Pidge didn't even look up from her laptop. "Hooray."

For someone who had only started _really_ hanging out with him for the past year, she certainly acted like his worst younger sister ever. True, Pidge had been around before then, and had even sat in with Lance and Hunk in some of their high school classes, but to say the least, neither Lance nor Hunk had ever expected to find friendship with her in college. Not for a few years, at least. It was truly a surprise to see that the supposed sophomore was actually graduating high school with them as they walked the stage, but since then, they had only gotten closer. 

When news came out that the commute to college was well over an hour, Lance jumped at the chance to help. Both Mr. and Mrs. Holt were skeptical at first, as any good parent would be, but after meeting the boys, Sophia, seeing where she would live and how quickly she had relaxed into herself, they felt almost as at ease as Pidge did. It was basically perfect. The sixteen year old had fit in with the group with barely any issue after she moved in, and now, Lance was paying the price for it because she fit in _too_ well. Well enough to pick on Lance without a second thought. 

He did not appreciate this fact one bit. 

"No need for sass, Pidgey," Lance said, glaring at her from his usual spot.

"No need to tell us about your failed plans." This time she spared him a deadpan stare. "Again."

Scoffing, Lance crossed his arms. "Rude."

"Then do something about it," she told him, turning back to her assignment.

"Or move on to the next topic," Hunk said, voice a little tight with stress. "That being the assignment we're supposed to be working on for our final?"

Again, Lance scoffed, and leaned back on the low brick-wall-turned-bench to spread out, folding his arms under his head for a cushion. "Relax, Hunk, the project isn't due until the end of the week."

"But we're in _college_ now," Hunk nearly whined. "Our standards are much higher now that we have all this responsibility." 

At that, Lance frowned. He had hoped taking their study session outside on such a beautiful day would help ease the tension, but Hunk was just as high strung as ever. They had set up at the usual patio table just outside of the quad in hopes of some fresh air. It was their spot to come to when they needed to unwind, and in Lance's case, stretch out to nap on the small, brick wall that surrounded the large, white flowering tree. Without fail, their table gave them a chance to relax and ground themselves, allowing them all to soak up some sunshine and breathe in the sweetened air before the blooms could rot. 

And it helped. It did. Just not enough. Not today, at least. It looked as though things would need to get a bit more serious if Lance wanted his pal to calm down. 

"Come on, Lance, this is serious!" Hunk said with a deep-set frown that shouldn't have been there in the first place. "What will your professor think if you show up late to class again without your homework tomorrow?" 

Clicking his teeth, Lance waved his hand in the air as he spoke, flinging it wildly while he poorly acted out their professor in a high pitched voice. "She'd probably think 'oh, I forgot I had another freshman, what was his name again? I don't really care because they all blur together at this point'." 

Suddenly, Lance sat up and crossed his legs so that he could grab onto his ankles, hunching a little to make himself look slightly menacing towards his friend in hopes of driving home his point, despite his non-threatening tone. "Hunk. All that psychological torture that high school shoved into your head about college being a cruel and unforgiving place that decides your entire future if you fail or succeed is just a bunch of bologna." He shook his head, eyes still locked onto his friend and voice going softer. "Your professors don't care, and if they do, they'll work with you." 

Then Lance shrugged, losing his gentler, serious tone for a more flippant one as he fell back to lie down again. "Or at least warn you when you're about to fall off the edge."

Up until that point, Hunk had been taking Lance seriously, but as usual, his best friend just had to go and ruin it with a bad joke, leaving Hunk in a heavy pout. "Well then, _I_ for one want my professor to care about me, so _I'm_ going to be perfect."

Lance shot a finger gun up at his friend from where he lay. "You're already perfect, bro."

"Bro." 

Already, Hunk was buried nose deep in his book, but he went through the motions regardless. Either out of reflex or comfort, it didn't really matter. All that did matter, was that he didn't seem as tense as before, if only marginally, and Lance smiled at the fact.

"And you know who else is perfect?" Lance asked, feeling satisfied with Hunk's comfort levels now. "Keith."

"Ugh." Pidge rolled her eyes.

"If you really think so then why has it taken you this long to ask him out?" Hunks asked, still keeping his eyes on his book while he wrote down notes.

"You can't just _ask_ Keith freaking Song _out,"_ Lance said, scandalized. "That's like asking Beyonce out to dinner and then taking her to Taco Bell. There's no class!"

"Since when are you classy?" Pidge asked, equally buried in her work.

Lance sat up to glare at her some more. "I'm a classy guy."

"You're not even classy in the middle of the _classroom,"_ Pidge said flatly.

This time, it was Lance giving the deadpan glare. "Your words wound me deeply."

Pidge pinched her brow. "If that's all it takes then how are you still alive?"

"Ha, ha, Pidge. Ha, ha." Lance rolled his eyes but laid back down again, wanting to move on. "But seriously, just think of the power couple status we'll have." He lifted a hand out to the air as though broadcasting his thoughts in the cinemas. "Two badass musicians at the top of the class battling it out against the rest of the world?" His smile brightened to outrival the sun. "It's poetry, baby."

Pidge ignored Lance in favor of looking at her lit up phone, expression never changing. "Well, you better find some flowery words for your poem pretty quick because Keith is almost here."

Lance shot straight up. "What!"

"Ten bucks says he chickens out again," Pidge said, not even looking as she set her phone back down to go back to her books.

"Oh, no." Hunk shook his head at his book while he highlighted text. "I'm not losing money on him again."

Lance straightened further, once again scandalized. "HUNK."

Finally, Hunk lifted his eyes just enough under his lashes to find Lance and shrugged. "Sorry, bro."

Then he dove right back down into his books. Sorry _indeed._

"Some friends you are," Lance griped. "Just watch; I'm gonna ask Keith out and then you won't be laughing anymore."

"Nope, we'll be laughing at your rejection," Pidge breezed easily.

"Nuh-uh, not gonna happen!" Lance said, a little too loudly as he shook his head and started throwing his arms around for more emphasis. "He's gonna say yes and it's gonna be super cute! _We'll_ be super cute! And then you'll be left alone to watch in envy of our cuteness!"

"Cute story, but flawed," Pidge said, then adjusted her glasses so that she could give Lance a smug look. "I won't be envious _or_ alone because I'm going out with Beazer later."

At that, Lance shook his head violently and gave Pidge a double take. "Wait, what? I thought you didn't do that?"

Finally, Pidge's composed facade morphed into one of annoyance as she frowned at Lance. "Just because I don't do sex doesn't mean I don't do dates, dumb ass."

"I'm not a dumb ass!" Lance actually shouted. His irritation was clear as he slammed his hands on the table to get his point across and rattled their books, making Hunk jump but Pidge fall back into her voided emotional state.

Pidge rolled her eyes and went back to her books. "I've yet to see otherwise."

"What just happened?" Hunk asked, honestly confused as he had been so absorbed into his work that he had missed the conversation entirely.

"I'll show you," Lance sneered, feeling petty. "I'm gonna ask him out right now, and then you'll feel terrible for doubting and betraying me."

"Really," Pidge drawled, still not looking away from her work.

"Yep." Lance nodded once. "So terrible."

Finally, Pidge looked up from her work, assessed the situation, then dropped back down to her book with a slight smirk. "Welp, here's your chance, Romeo."

In an instant, Lance went ramrod straight and whipped around behind him. His heart sank into his gut, because walking up the path was a rather haggard looking Keith, a meager five feet away from where Lance had been proclaiming his promises for a perfect date. Great.

"Hey guys," Keith said with a wave.

"KEITH. BUDDY. HI." Lance was still stiff, his ears crushed by the pressure of his shoulders as he stared wide eyed at his friend. "HOW ARE YOU."

Was that too loud? That was kind of loud. Or was it? No, it was fine.

Sighing, Keith dropped his stuff onto the table and dropped down into his seat, barely staying upright while he rubbed at his eyes. "You've got too much volume for this late in the semester."

Damn.

"Excuse you, I am just the right volume for the outdoors," Lance said with a scoff, then spread his arms out wide to present his evidence. _"Because we're outdoors."_

Keith did nothing but hum, still jamming his fingers into his eyes and trying not to curl over his backpack. He looked better than he did the month prior, but he was still rather gaunt, and the bags under his eyes had barely gone away. Hunk seemed to be thinking the same thing, because he looked up from his work to look Keith over critically.

"You okay, bud?" Hunk asked, a little worried at the idea of his friend stumbling on his feet again.

"I'm fine. Just a little headache," Keith muttered, finally giving his eyes a rest to look over his friends. "Professor Bob is being an ass again. We've got too much going on as is, we _don't_ need his ridiculous commentary about _every single thing_ we do."

"Ugh, I hate Bob," Lance hissed. "He's always calling me a dummy."

"That's because you are a dummy," Pidge said easily, ignoring Lance's squawk to look Keith over as he began pulling out his books. "Seriously though, you look like shit."

"Thanks," Keith said dryly. "I told you, I'm fine."

"Yeah, but you said the same thing before you almost passed out on your feet while giving your presentation last month," Pidge said, cocking a brow. " _At_ the podium. Forgive me for being a skeptic."

Nodding, Hunk leaned forward to speak a little softer to Keith, almost conspiratorially if not for the concern lacing his entire being. "Have you eaten? When's the last time you slept?"

"I said I'm _fine,_ jeez!" Keith snapped, then snatched up a protein bar from his bag and held it up to show that he was, in fact, about to eat. "I went to bed last night, too. Happy now, _mom?"_

"Very," Pidge said bluntly, then dropped back to her work.

"C'mon, Mullet, we're just worried about you," Lance said as he stood up to lean heavily on Keith, wrapping an arm across his shoulders so that he could put too much weight on his friend. "Let us nag."

Keith huffed, but said nothing else. He hadn't realized how bad it had gotten before until he had stumbled and nearly fallen over _just_ for turning to point at his PowerPoint on screen a little too fast. If not for his partner, he would have surely slammed into the floor, and the truth of that fact hit the rest of the classroom like a freaking freight train. After that, his teacher forced him to leave for the on campus nurse, and then the others began to worry about him when he was released to go back to his dorm. 

That in itself was a problem as well. There were suddenly more group texts and study sessions and snacks and lunches and dinners and homework parties, plus all the nagging and worrying and reminder texts to eat or drink or sleep like he wasn't a functioning human being. It didn't matter that it was true and the reminders helped, it was still too much attention. He still wasn't used to it. Not when it was connected to affection, anyway. Instead of pointing that out, however, Keith just slid his shoulders down and smacked Lance away when the boy lost his balance. It was weird how close it all was.

For half a second, Lance floundered in the air in his attempts to keep his face from planting in the ground. Keith ignored this and went right on eating his food, having not cared for Lance's touchy, feely reasurrences. Despite Keith's literal brush off, Lance was not deterred. In fact, he was more determined than ever… after catching the unconvinced, almost judging glance shared between Hunk and Pidge. 

This. This bothered him. More than he cared to admit, actually. More than he ever _would_ admit. Because his friends doubted him. They _openly_ doubted him, and while this was nothing new, Lance found it infuriating all the same because he _knew_ he could do this. He just had to try.

Indignant, Lance gave one last glare to his unsupportive friends before slipping into a trying smile and sliding closer to Keith, leaning on the table this time. "You know, Keith, I could give you a better meal than a protein bar ever could," he said, cocking his head with a sly grin. "What do you say; free tomorrow night?"

"Can't. I have work," Keith said around a mouthful of chocolate and peanut butter. 

"What about the day after?" Lance pressed.

"More work," Keith said, going in for another bite. "Picking up extra shifts at Dominos to pay off my new phone bill."

Lance blinked, confused and slightly concerned for a second. "New bill, same number?"

"Yeah," Keith muttered as he took in the last half of his protein bar in a single bite. He was more hungry than he had realized.

"So I can still call you later?" Lance asked.

With his cheeks stuffed full of food, Keith could only nod and hum out an affirmative, making Lance relax with a sigh. "Good. It'd be hard to plan this without being able to contact you."

Keith snorted a deriving little scoff through his nose, caught in a joke that no one else was aware of before finally swallowing the last of his snack. "No point in planning when I have no time, dude."

At that, Lance pouted a bit. Both at Keith's unhelpfulness and his traitorous friend's judging side eyes across the table. He shot a glare at them, out of sight from over Keith's shoulder, then crossed his arms to lean in closer to Keith again.

"When will you have time?" Lance asked.

"Honestly? Not any time soon." Keith was beginning to unpack his bag to study again, eyes focused on the task instead of Lance. "Especially if I want to find work for the summer."

"Aw, c'mon, Keith, live a little!" Lance said, slapping a hand over Keith's shoulder for a rough shake that earned him a glare before Keith went back to unpacking. "You can take a break every once in a while. Come have dinner with me."

"Why?" Keith still wasn't looking at him, more concerned with booting up his laptop. "I'm doing much better, you don't have to watch me to make sure I'm eating. I'm not a baby."

"No, you're a _babe,"_ Lance said with a sly grin and a lecherous wink, pointing a finger gun at Keith.

Finally, Keith reacted. His head shot up from his computer, eyes widened slightly, and locked onto his friends' reaction as he stiffened up in Lance's grip still on his shoulder. The others were openly watching from under their brows, smirking or judging and not being subtle at all because Lance was- no. No, this couldn't be happening. This can't be happening.

"Let me take you out." Lance's grin sweetened. "I'm buying."

It's happening.

"I'm not interested in dating," Keith said bluntly, dropping his head and hunching his shoulders to appear smaller. If they could move past this, then they never had to worry about it again. Things could stay the same. He could stay safe.

But Lance was stubborn.

"Oh, come on, it'll be great!” Lance insisted. “There's that new sushi place opening up at the mall. We could feed each other." The cringe hit Lance like a truck, and his eyes widened for a split second over his too wide smile before he dug his heels in and kept going. He was in too deep now, no backing out. "Just you and me, Keithy boy. It'll be romantic."

Without looking at him, Keith shrank further into himself and shook his head to his lap. "I said no, now drop it."

"Okay, so seafood is out,” Lance said, looking to the sky in thought. “How about tacos then?"

Keith shook his head to his lap again. "I don't want tacos with you."

"Nah, you're right. Nobody wants to go on a date with someone with spicy pepper breath," Lance said, waving off the idea and putting more weight onto Keith’s shoulder as he shifted. "Makes for terrible kisses.”

Lance still wasn’t looking at Keith much either. He wasn't looking at anyone, really; too scared to, and the sky was giving him more ideas to work with than anything else. He thought for another moment to ignore the shift in Keith’s shoulder as Keith began to stuff his things back into his bag, knowing he needed to work fast before Keith left for good. Suddenly, Lance chanced a glance down at the boy, excited. 

“How about ice cream, then?" Lance asked. "You like ice cream, right? Everybody loves ice cream."

Again, Keith shook his head, and this time, he slipped out of Lance’s grasp. "I don't want ice cream with you either, I-"

"Or maybe a home cooked meal?” Lance tried, offering a smile. “I could cook you something special."

"No, I don't-"

"You're right again; we should cook together!” Lance’s smile was blinding now with the thought. “Great idea, Keith. I knew you were the smart one."

Keith certainly didn’t feel very smart right then. "Lance-"

Pidge was glaring for reasons unknown, but Lance was too lost in his own fantasies to care. "Dude-"

“No, no, this is actually perfect!” Lance said, getting even more excited. "Because then we could snuggle on the couch after."

Keith shirked his shoulder away from more of Lance’s advances and began packing his things in earnest, not even bothering to stuff some into his bag as he stood and began to leave. "Lance, leave me alone."

Lance did not. Instead, he started following Keith, speaking wildly with his hands in evergrowing glee. "We could watch a movie, have some dessert, just you and me."

_"Lance.”_ Keith turned and whipped a glare at him, wide and alert and something else, but Lance couldn’t see it past the scene he had played out in his mind. “I said no and I mean it. Now leave me alone."

"Don't be ridiculous,” Lance scoffed playfully, pulling Keith back by the arm to wave a hand over his own grinning, charming face. “You can't say you don't want a bit of Netflix and chill with this handsome face."

Too many things happened at once for Lance to completely comprehend. A spark of heightened emotion in Keith’s eyes- something like fear or anger or maybe panic? The tension of muscles locking up into place so stiff that it was practically stone. The call of his name from his friends at the table behind them faintly ringing in his ears before and _after_ a bloom of pain took him over. The most notable of these happenings, however, was the fact that the blur he saw connected with his face and sent him flying to the ground.

Lance clutched at his burning cheek, eyes wide and spastic as he tried to comprehend what had just happened. The back of his head hurt from the fall, but the front of it also hurt from a hit that had happened much faster than anything else he had ever experienced before. It confused Lance to no end because he simply couldn’t understand how he had ended up on the pavement, but one look at Keith said it all. 

Looming over him, eyes glowing with danger and threat, Keith’s shoulders heaved with barely restrained breath, still poised in the after curl of a strong punch. His teeth were bared in anger as he panted slightly, restraining the worst of his emotions as best he could to keep from attacking any further, but it was obvious how much he was holding back because this… this was pure rage. In all the months that they had known each other, Keith had never been this enraged before as he seethed at Lance on the ground, and from it, Lance was truly afraid.

"Stay the _fuck_ away from me," Keith practically hissed. Then, with one last huff, he turned on his heel and stormed away, shoulders tight with fury.

All Lance could do was watch him leave, still sprawled out on his elbows and holding onto his cheek gaping like a fish. The burn in Keith’s eyes had been familiar, a look that Lance had never hoped to see on someone he cared about again, because he recognized that anger, that hurt, that fear, and he hated how his mind instantly flashed back to his worst nights back at home. It took him a moment to realize that Hunk had come to kneel beside him shortly after he had been hit, worrying over him like a mother hen and trying to check him for damage, but Lance was too engrossed in memories of his father, of the burn in Keith’s eyes, of the ache in his chest that hurt more than anything else on his bruised up body while he watched his crush walk away. 

Crush. _His_ crush. The boy who crushed his heart. What an apt title for such a position. 

"… What the _Hell?!"_ Lance shrieked, tears filling his vision from frustration and disappointment because Keith was- Keith wasn’t- Lance furiously wiped at his eyes, determined not to let another one of his tears fall for anyone who didn’t accept him again. "That- that homophobic _bastard!_ How could he…" 

Lance couldn't finish, couldn't speak. Instead, he shook his head, allowing anger and hate to fill his heart so that nothing else could hurt it while it was broken. This wasn’t what he had expected at all.

Pidge though? She absolutely had.

"You're kidding, right?” Pidge asked flatly, crossing her arms and giving him a deadpan glare as she stood back from the pair on the ground. “You completely deserved that."

Hunk turned to her as he helped guide Lance up into a sitting position, confused and a little shocked to see his friend turn on Lance so easily. Being the guy that he was, however, he wanted to give her a chance. Wanted to see her point of view. Wanted to keep another fight from breaking up more of his friendships. 

"What do you mean?" Hunk asked.

"Yeah! What do you mean?” Lance shouted, still holding his cheek and growing angrier by the second. “I was nothing but nice to him! If he didn't want to date a guy he should have just said so, there was no need for violence!"

"He _did_ say so, Lance,” Pidge said, furrowing her brow to intensify her glare at him. “There was nothing homophobic about it. You were just being a creep."

Now Lance was definitely angry.

"How the hell-"

"C'mon, Keith, let me take you out,” Pidge cut him off with a snarky change in tone of her voice. “Don't be difficult, just say yes, let’s go have fun tonight, c’mon, you know you want to."

Suddenly, Hunk stiffened up with a silent gasp, his lips pursed in a round shape as he began to understand. "Oooh."

Lance, on the other hand, did not. His eyes flicked back and forth irritably between his friends trying to find the connection that he was too angry to see clearly. "'Oh'? What 'oh'? What am I missing here?"

Stepping closer, Pidge bent over at the waist to meet up with Lance eye to eye, her confrontational gaze strangely calm compared to her usual explosion of sass. “Lance. Look me in the eyes and listen real closely.” She uncrossed her arms to grasp onto Lance’s shoulders and squeezed lightly. “No. Means. _No!”_

Her eyes bore into his as she spoke slowly and clearly before giving him a slight shake on the last word, making Lance slap her hands away from him in irritation. 

"I know that!" Lance snapped.

"Do you?” Pidge asked, quirking a brow. “Because your actions say otherwise."

The scowl Lance wore only grew deeper, more annoyed and hurt and confused and Lance didn’t like it. "You're not making any sense," he brushed off irritably, pulling away from Hunk to stand on his own. “Keith got violent, not me. That’s not my fault.”

“It kind of is, though,” Pidge insisted, arms crossing again and expression void of any compassion. "He said no. Multiple times. Yet you kept pushing because you wouldn't take no for an answer."

"That's not true,” Lance snapped again, glowering at the smaller girl. “I know he likes me enough already. If he gave me a chance I know things could work out, he just needed convincing."

Hunk lifted a hand, uncomfortable and scared of another potential fight. “Guys, let’s not-”

"Would you be saying the same thing about me?" Pidge cut in, ignoring Hunk.

"Wha- of course not, why would you ask me that?" The question caught Lance so off guard that he actually did a double take on Pidge, trying to find where her logic connected her to such a thing.

"So it's okay with Keith because he's a guy," Pidge went on, unyielding.

“Guys, please-”

"You're putting words in my mouth, I never said that!" Lance griped, getting angrier by the second.

Pidge shook her head, uncaring. "No, you're just not getting it."

“Oh, because I’m a big dummy, is that it?” Lance shouted, using his height to lord over an unafraid Pidge in his anger, his fists at his side. “I don’t get why some homophobic jerk turned me down because I’m just a dumb, stupid Latino boy, right?”

_“GUYS!”_

Both Pidge and Lance jumped at the sudden force of Hunk’s voice and turned wide eyes to their friend practically smouldering with barely contained annoyance. His shoulders were hunched, fists at his side as well, and frowning openly at the fight happening before him; the very fight he had been afraid of brewing in the first place. Hunk glared at the two of them, giving them each a quick glance to their eyes before moving on to make sure he had their attention, and giving them each a chance to breathe in and out before speaking. His tactics worked, because both Pidge and Lance gave each other one last glare before pulling away from their combative stances, crossing their arms and scowling away from the other.

“Lance,” Hunk started, making the boy frown harder. “Pidge isn’t calling you dumb.” 

“She already _has,”_ Lance snipped.

“Because you _are,”_ Pidge clipped back.

“No, we’re not doing that!” Hunk said firmly, admonishing Pidge with a sharp look that had her scoffing and turning away. 

Lance though, Lance curled into himself tighter, his gaze burning a hole in the ground in anger and frustration and humiliation because of the afternoon’s events. Hunk knew that Lance was insecure enough as it was about his abilities thanks to his upbringing and being compared to four other siblings and _God knew_ however many other cousins he had. His intelligence was a particularly sore spot for him, and thanks to this, Lance had become especially studious, and worked harder than anyone gave him credit for. A fact that he hid so as not to be seen as an even bigger failure should one of his plans fail. Hunk knew of his secrets, though, and adding all that onto the stress of their professors underestimating him, his friends turning on him, and now his crush destroying his pride- there was not a doubt in Hunk’s mind that Lance felt especially stupid at this very moment, and Pidge was _not_ helping.

“Lance, you’re not dumb, but what happened could have been avoided if dumb things had not happened _first,”_ Hunk said with even words. “Keith clearly stated that he wasn’t interested in dating.” He shook his head. “He said nothing about homophobia or disinterest in you, but in dating specifically. So who’s to say he’s not aromantic? Or ace in general?”

“Exactly!” Pidge said, exasperated as she turned to snap at Lance some more to defend her potential ace partner. “And then you come up and start spouting off about a 'night of fun' after he turned you down _multiple_ times. Like he was nothing but a piece of tail.”

The terms ace and aromantic were new in their dictionary thanks to the recent existence of Pidge in their lives, so Lance was aware of their meaning, and understood why what he had done might have been a bad thing. He had accepted these terms without hesitation, even if he didn’t fully understand them himself, yet. All that had mattered at the time of explination was that Pidge wasn’t interested in sex, and that maybe there were others in the world who felt the same way that she did. So maybe, just maybe, Keith could be the same way. 

It made sense. It did. But none of this was getting through to Lance, though. Because he was angry, and hurt, and confused. Because his fantasies had lied to him, and made him see things that weren’t true. Because he only felt humiliated and dumb in front of people who openly doubted him when he was supposed to feel supported and loved by them. Because his emotions were clouding his judgement and all he could hear in his head was his father’s voice telling him how he had failed yet again.

Because he had gone after something with a pulse.

"You guys are being ridiculous and making me out to be the bad guy when _I_ just got my heart ripped out and stomped on,” Lance said, turning a scorching sneer to the two. “You're supposed to be my friends!"

"We _are_ friends," Pidge said, but her voice was too harsh to be convincing.

"Really? Cause it sure doesn't feel like it,” Lance shot back. “I'm the one who got hurt, here, and you're more worried about the guy that hit me!"

Hunk gave him a look, one that hurt more than it should have because he looked hurt himself. "Lance-"

"No!” Lance wasn’t having it. They were supposed to care about him, they were supposed to be on his side, they were supposed to love him- this wasn’t supposed to happen again. “If this is how you're going to act when _I'm_ the one who got assaulted, then why am I even hanging out with you?"

"Lance!" The hurt on Hunk’s face only grew, but Lance didn’t care anymore.

"Forget it!” Lance shouted, turning away from them to snatch up his things and leave. “I don't need you guys to beat me up, too."

“Lance, come on-”

Hunk tried to stop him from leaving but it was too late. Lance was too furious, and he couldn’t stand to look at anymore people who had betrayed him. It seemed to be a running theme in his life, lately. One that he was far too tired to deal with again.

-

It only took a day for Lance to finally get it. When he came stomping home, Tía Sophia was there with open arms to help comfort and calm him down. As usual, Sophia helped him to see things clearer in her special way, and by the morning, Lance's conscience felt worse than his bruised face. He timidly apologized to the others at breakfast and promised to make things right, making Hunk swoop in with a bone crushing hug that they both needed in order to feel better. Even Pidge warmed up to him, realizing things had not gone the way she had wanted them to the afternoon before and felt more guilty over the fact that Hunk was upset than Lance was. It wasn’t the reunion any of them wanted, but it was a start. Now all they needed left was Keith.

All through the morning, Lance's insides felt twisted with fear and regret. His foot thumped against the car flooring anxiously as they carpooled to class, and his eyes locked onto the outside surroundings as they passed, not really able to concentrate on the quiet conversation going on in the early morning ride. He hardly said a word as they walked to the buildings as well, and when they broke off to go to their separate classes, Lance dreaded his lonesome walk. Keith would be waiting for him there, and Lance was _not_ ready. 

Still. They needed to go to class. So Lance took in a deep breath, and marched through the open door.

As usual, Keith was sitting in his front row middle spot, the empty seat next to him taunting Lance as he slowed to a stop in the middle of the room. The movement caught Keith’s eye, and when he looked up, he glared at Lance for a moment, before pointedly grabbing his bag to aimlessly dig through it, find nothing, and casually drop it onto the empty seat next to him. To anyone else, it meant nothing. To Lance, it was an obvious message.

“Oh, my God!”

Lance turned to the sudden concern of his professor’s voice, finding her staring at him with a slight furrow to her brow.

“Mr. Espinosa, are you alright?” she asked, then motion a hand over her face. “What happened?”

Forgetting all about the bruise, Lance lifted a hand to his face as well and winced when his fingers connected to the darkened tissue. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Keith stiffen up as well, and the whites of his eyes broadcast brighter than anything else in Lance’s vision. Lance flicked his gaze over to Keith for a moment, confused as to what had brought on the sudden change from anger to fear when it clicked: Keith had hit him. Keith, the scholarship kid, had assaulted another person. If word ever got out about that, he’d be done for. Lance wouldn’t have it.

“Have you ever heard of staircase surfing?” Lance asked instead, looking to his teacher with uncertainty.

For a moment, the woman furrowed her brow in confusion. Then, her expression dropped all compassion to be replaced with exasperation, shaking her head at yet another stupid freshman as the rest of the room broke into stifled snickers or eye rolls.

“Do be more careful, Mr. Espinosa,” she said, almost sounding annoyed. “The last thing this world needs is another braindead boy.”

Lance offered her a wide, forced grin and a two fingered salute. “Yes ma’am.”

After that, she nodded him away to have a seat, and Lance was able to take the empty seat next to Keith’s bag- the bag taking up his usual seat. Still not where he wanted to be, but close enough to keep from arousing suspicion from the others. Not only that, but Keith had relaxed enough after Lance’s explanation that he could actually focus on class by then, and Lance didn’t want to ruin that. He didn’t want to push his luck with Keith in any way, so he decided to wait for the end of class to try to talk to him. 

But Keith was fast.

And stubborn.

And for the next week, Lance was unable to flag Keith down for anything- not even a hello. If ever Lance tried to wave, Keith looked away. Smiles were ignored and greetings were tuned out. Texts were left unread, calls missed and classroom chat sites were clipped and to the point. 

Keith was clear about where he stood, but Lance couldn’t let that happen. Not when Keith meant so much to him. Not when he knew what it felt like to have someone try to put him in a box that he didn’t fit into or belong in. If Keith never wanted to be Lance’s friend again, he could accept that. He hated the idea, but he could accept it. Eventually. 

What he could not accept, was the fact that Keith thought Lance only saw him as nothing more than a challenge, or a piece of tail. He was determined to make it up to Keith, and finally, after a week and a half of dancing around each other, Lance was finally able to track down Keith in the library. Alone. 

Keith was just sitting there, surrounded by books and notebooks and looking as frazzled as ever. He had the entire table to himself, a feat that spoke more on the fact that Keith looked pretty scary when he was tired rather than the fact that he didn't have any friends. A single look would deter anyone away from his table, but after almost a year of friendship, Lance and his roommates knew the glare to be harmless. It seemed that Lance and his friends were the only ones to notice that. 

All the more reason to patch things up with their loner friend.

Moving quickly, Lance trotted over to the cafe and bought a coffee and a blueberry muffin, then scurried back over to where he saw Keith last. As Lance walked up to Keith, the boy scowled at Lance and sighed, aggravated as he began to pack up his things. It was slow goings, though, because Keith was pinned under a mountain of books and photocopied notes, making it difficult for him to run away. Just as Lance had planned.

“Wait- I come in peace,” Lance said, holding up his hands as best he could with the coffee and muffin clutched in them. “I don't want to flirt, just talk." He shook his head. “I’m not asking you out again.”

Keith said nothing, but glared at Lance, looking him up and down. Without a word, Lance reached over and set the offerings down in front of Keith. Lance hated to admit it, but he had noticed that the bags under Keith’s eyes had grown darker, and it looked as though Keith was losing weight again. Whatever Lance had done to ruin their relationship, he had done double damage to Keith’s progress in taking care of himself again, and Lance couldn’t stand for that. 

Instead of taking the gift, though, Keith just glanced at it, then went right back to keeping his eye on Lance. Untrusting.

“Black, just how you like it,” Lance said, hoping Keith’s need for caffeine would override his pride, even though Lance's better judgement knew otherwise. "It's a peace offering." 

"I'm not drinking your date-rape coffee," Keith said, curtly, making Lance flinch.

"Okay, that hurt, but I guess it's not entirely unwarranted," Lance said, shuffling back on his feet and studying the floor for a moment to collect himself before trying again. "You should know that I don't hit it and quit it.” He shook his head again. “That's not my style, and I never intended to do that with you."

Keith narrowed his eyes and turned away. "I'm leaving."

"No wait!" Instantly, Lance flared his hands out in a panic, desperate to stop him. "Damn it- that's not what I meant either, I'm not trying to push a relationship on you again, I just meant- gah!"

Without any warning, Lance snatched up Keith’s coffee and took a big swig of it, burning his tongue and absolutely hating the acrid taste. Keith was stopped, eyes watching in dumbfounded confusion as Lance drank the supposed poisoned coffee with eyes squinted shut and disgust furrowing his usually soft, open features. When he pulled away with a revolted sigh, Keith blinked back to reality.

"How can you drink that stuff?” Lance asked, his voice scratching with distaste as his nose wrinkled, and he placed the coffee back down as far away from himself as possible. “It's so bitter, oh my God."

In a desperate attempt to rid the taste in his mouth, Lance picked up the muffin as well and pinched off a piece of the top to pop into his mouth, taking extra care to suck on the blueberries inside in a vain hope to cover his tastebuds. All Keith could do was watch as Lance made a fool of himself in the middle of the library, eyes taking in every detail they could in his exhausted state. When Lance finally finished his noisy whining, he uselessly rubbed at his nose in hopes of tricking his mouth into thinking it couldn't taste anymore, then looked to Keith, honestly, cautiously, hopefully.

"Look, you don't have to forgive me, but could you please just hear me out?" Lance asked. "I don't like how we left things off."

For a moment, Keith did nothing, just eyed Lance up and down, studying again with his watchful eye. Then, after the moment passed, Keith reached out and pulled the coffee and muffin closer to himself, waiting to ingest them until after he had seen what they did to Lance, first. It was enough for Lance, and when he motioned towards the seat across from Keith, Keith nodded and allowed him to sit. Silence weighed heavily between the two as Lance situated himself, folding his hands in front if himself and hunching his shoulders a bit to appear non-threatening towards Keith, who sat back as far away from the boy as he could. Watching. Studying. Neither of them liked it.

"About before," Lance said seriously. "I didn't…" He sighed, eyes closing in frustration before opening again to show his sincerity. "I didn't realize how creepy I had come off until way later, and I never meant to make you uncomfortable."

At this point, it was Lance that was uncomfortable, especially with Keith's unrelenting stare. Lance knew he wouldn't get off so easily, felt that he _shouldn't,_ but it left his skin crawling all the same. So, as usual for whenever he felt wrong or scared or under pressure, he did the one coping mechanism he knew best. He rambled.

"Hunk and Pidge were giving me shit about it beforehand saying I couldn't do it and I felt like I had something to prove which isn't your fault but you paid for it anyway and they made sure that I _knew_ that when you left because I screwed up so bad and I just kept making it worse and worse and I-" Lance growled in frustration, fists grabbing onto his hair for a moment before flailing about again with stiffened intent. "My nerves got in the way and it's not an excuse but I went too far because I like you so much that I panicked and I wanted it to work but my brain kept on spewing words and my mouth wouldn't stop moving just like it is right now oh my God _stop me."_

Suddenly, Lance dropped his face down into his hands and curled up over the table to groan out a muffled scream of embarrassment at all the cringe he had endured _and_ caused. This would keep him up at night for _years._

On the other hand, Keith was not impressed. 

"So am I just supposed to forgive you now because of all your excuses and be swept off my feet over your noble sacrifice of not fucking me?" Keith asked flatly, making Lance's head shoot up from his hands.

"What? No! No, not at all, I- ugh." Lance dropped his head back into a single hand this time and huffed out a sigh, his other hand letting his fingers drum out an anxious beat against the table. 

"This isn't going how I wanted at all, I never wanted to sound like I'm trying to get you to date me again, I swear to _carbs,_ I'm just an idiot who doesn't know how to talk to you about this stuff! I don't-" Lance moved his hand to look Keith in the eye, desperate to convey himself in a way that Keith would understand. "That's not what I'm trying to do, I swear. I just…"

Again, Lance sighed. He sighed so heavily that his shoulders dropped, defeated. His normally bright, blue eyes dimmed as they searched the table despondently, worried that he had failed again, that he had lost Keith, his teammate, his friend- all because he didn't know how to talk to the guy. The thought alone brought tears to his eyes, but Lance squeezed them shut, refusing to let Keith see him cry and somehow sway the guy into feeling sorry for him or guilting him back into friendship. That wasn't the way he wanted to keep things with any of his friends. Least of all Keith.

"I'm sorry," Lance finally said quietly, opening his eyes to the table as he hung his head in shame. "I’m sorry I pushed, I'm sorry I didn't listen, I'm sorry I tried to take things my way instead of accepting reality, I'm sorry I didn't take 'no' for an answer, I'm sorry I crossed too many lines and ignored you and your feelings, I'm just- sorry." He shook his head to the table. "I'm so, _so_ sorry, Keith. It was creepy, but more than that, it was disrespectful."

Lance looked up to Keith, hoping his sincerity would pull through and somehow chip away at the man's protective wall. "I promise, I won’t ask again, and I understand if you never want to speak to me again." His eyes grew even more sad, and his voice somber but determined as he continued on. 

"If that's the case, then fine, I'll walk away and you'll never have to deal with me," he whispered, making something shift in Keith's features. "But, if not… If you can forgive me, I-" His eyes shifted between Keith's, trying to find the right words and stumbling. "I _do_ want to keep you in my life because I _do_ like you; even if it's not romantically." Keith had stiffened at that, but Lance went on, hoping to gloss over any potential romantic intentions with platonic needs instead. "I enjoy your company, and I don’t want to lose that. I like being friends with you, so…" 

Slowly, carefully, Lance lifted his hand to Keith with a gleam of hope in his eye. “Just friends?”

Keith studied him for a bit, trying to see if Lance was lying in any way because it had been done before by people much more trustworthy than even him. He was tired. So damn tired of having to study people and be wrong about them- or worse, be right and let it happen anyway. Keith knew the moment he laid eyes on this dark skinned, blue eyed beauty that he would be nothing but trouble, nothing but a hindrance to his plans to lay low and wait out the four years he needed to prepare as Acxa's guardian. He knew the temptation was dangerous. He knew. But he didn't care.

Because four years was a long time to be alone, and he had come to like the idea of having friends. In the past week alone, he had caught himself wishing he had Hunk to make sure he ate or Pidge to annoy him into studying something new or even Lance to make sure he took a break and kept his brain from frying. One week. Just one. And he had already fallen apart without them. Not just the blue eyes he had missed so much. 

So, without a word, Keith lifted his hand as well and grasped onto Lance's, his expression stern as he glowered a serious warning. A warning that Keith tried to lie and claim was for Lance alone.

“Just friends.”

-

"Lookin' good, Mullet!"

Lance had burst into his obnoxious laughter but quickly cut himself off to snicker at his friend's expense, speaking loud enough for all to hear and look towards the cause of his amusement. Keith didn't bother to give Lance any more reaction than an eyeroll and kept at it with the dishes after wiping off the splash of dirty dishwater from his face. Things had been stiff for a couple of weeks after they had made up, but they had finally started to settle down after Lance began coming to the diner every day trying to cheer everyone up. The job offer didn't hurt things much, either. 

Hunk shook his head, chuckling softly to his grill as he flipped another patty for his latest experimental addition to the menu. If it tasted half as good as it smelled, then there may be hope for the diner yet. Given that it was pretty much Hunk's cooking and Pidge's PR skills that brought everyone in nowadays anyways, the gang had hope for this to be true. So, when Lance suggested that Keith join the party for some more stable cash, Keith was more than willing to work diligently, and Sal was willing to do absolutely _anything_ Hunk said. There wasn't even an interview. 

The same couldn't be said for the rest of the diner staff- nor the line of people spilling out through the door waiting to meet with Pidge for a chance to sign up for the diner's first open mic night. Open invitation or not, Pidge refused to have any sour notes in her project, and that included attitudes as well as the music in general. The afternoon had been filled with an endless stream of music students from the college trying to prove their degree would be worth something, and one after the other, Pidge wrote down her notes and planned her next move. There was the occasional poor soul who sounded much better in the shower than they ever would on stage, but for the most part, it was pretty apparent that Pidge was pleased with her selection so far. 

Things were looking up for the four of them. They were happy, if not content with the outcome of what could easily have ruined the entire dynamic of their friendship. Pidge was starting to ease up more of her ruthless teasing, Lance's black eye had completely healed up and even Keith was beginning to trust Lance more and more the longer they all hung out. It was great. Just fine. Everything had worked out just fine. 

Except for the hole in Lance's heart that just wouldn't go away. 

The boy gave an empty smile to his milkshake as he stirred it around, forcing himself to keep his eyes down. Keith was more beautiful and perfect every day, but whenever Lance got too close or looked too long, Keith's discomfort became evident, and Lance was forced to back away even more. Because Keith didn't feel the same way that Lance did, and Lance respected that, he did- but that didn't mean the feelings he already had would just fade away overnight. Lance had broken the cardinal rule and fallen for a straight boy, and now he was paying the price for it. It was a truth that he was more than familiar with, but a painful one nonetheless. 

Still, Lance hadn't been lying. Even if he couldn't keep Keith in his heart romantically, Lance was pleased that he could still keep Keith as a friend. If that was all that he could ever get, then Lance was happy with what he was given. Keith was precious to him, and made his life better in ways that Lance couldn't quite describe. His friendship with Keith was a gift that Lance didn't know how he could ever repay. Lance's smile softened even more to his milkshake as he continued stirring, admonishing himself for being poetic again when the barseat next to his was taken, and a shadow filled his peripheral. 

"That drink of yours must have done something truly special to have earned a smile like that."

Lance turned to the voice, pulled out of his thoughts by how smooth and crisp it was and was stunned by the man it belonged to. Dark eyes, a sharp, charming smile and long, flowing hair captured Lance's attention in an instant, and for a moment, he was too tongue-tied to speak. Instead, Lance stared, wide eyed and mouth fluttering open and closed in an attempt to try and say something, _anything,_ but the man before him was just too stunning to comprehend. This made that sharp smile widen, and Lance knew he was done for. 

"Well now, it looks like I'm mistaken," the man said, his voice dropping deliciously lower. "Smile or no, you're just naturally that beautiful."

Lord have mercy. 

At the grill, Hunk cleared his throat loudly into his elbow, jolting Lance back into reality and jumpstarting his brain back online. God bless Lance's best friend for helping this poor bastard get some digits. Shaking the thought from his head, Lance offered his own charming smile to the man instead. 

"You're one to talk," Lance said, holding out his hand. "Mister…?"

"Lotor," the man said, taking Lance's hand in his own for a shake. Instead of returning or letting it go, though, Lotor kept his smile up while he kept hold of Lance's hand on the bartable between them. "And you?"

Lance had to force himself not to bite his lip as he grinned down to their touching skin. "The name's Lance."

Lotor hummed at this, his dark eyes never leaving Lance's in an intense stare that Lance hoped never left. "Pleasure to meet you." 

_Fuck_ his voice was so smooth. 

"And you," Lance replied, still with that dumb, little grin of his plastered onto his face. Somewhere in the background, a basket of silverware could be heard clanging loudly in the metal sink, but Lance couldn't focus on that at the moment. "So tell me, are you here for the food or the try outs?"

At this, Lotor's smile changed from predator to playful, and it _did things._ "I've always heard the food here was rather noxious," Lotor said. "But if given the chance, I'll always be on the lookout for a performance."

"Well, you're in luck," Lance said, laying his chin onto his free hand so that he could subtly lean in closer to Lotor. Subtly. "My buddy Hunk here happens to be the best chef in town. And if you're good enough, Pidge over there will let you up on her stage."

"And what about you?" Lotor asked, dragging his finger slowly along Lance's knuckles. One. By. One. "What can I get from you, Lance?"

Soft at first, then dragging out over the rest of him, Lance's eyes lit up with a cheshire smile that he felt deep within his soul. "I can think of a few things."

He may not give Lance the same butterflies in his stomach, but maybe, just maybe, this Lotor guy could help fill the hole that Keith had left behind.

Lance could only hope. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Yes, Lotor goes to their school and when he went up to audition for open mic night Lance was left at the bar absolutely floored because damn this guy can sing and-
> 
> "Holy fuck, Hunk, he's into me," Lance breathed in disbelief. 
> 
> Behind him, Hunk leaned on an elbow over the bar and clapped a hand over Lance's shoulder, smiling into his ear. "I know, buddy," he whispered, then gave him another pat before pulling away to continue cooking. "Good job."
> 
> The Crush Song  
> twaimz  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHDuYT1WdmQ 
> 
> Thanks so much for your patience, guys, I really appreciate it. So far, everything has been going smoothly but it's only the beginning and I don't trust it as far as I can throw it SO, let's hope I'm wrong and things will be ok down here. I'm hoping I can write some more for you soon, but for the moment, please enjoy this bonus chapter :) I hope you like it
> 
> Tell me what you think, I love hearing from you guys :)


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